Friday, January 06, 2006

5 years of marriage

Well, I feel silly, almost forgot to post on this one!

Wedding anniversaries are strange things. They aren't a birthday, though it feels like a birthday. Not a lot of people remember anniversaries, though. Usually Donald's folks and grandparents send us a card or call us, or even just email us.

You don't get gifts for an anniversary, but people usually do something to commemorate the occassion.

I cleaned the bathroom. My husband has been working on selling things on ebay. We watched a bunch of "Firefly" episodes on Sci Fi channel. Nothing terribly exciting.

Donald is still working on ebay, and I'm going to look up some more facts on adoption. I just ended another month of "NOT BEING PREGNANT"

Is there a checklist I need to fill out? I feel as if there is. 1) I'm overweight. can't be pregnant with that problem. I mean, not the usual overweight, but BIG TIME 2) My husband and I struggle with spending too much money, and spending money on things we don't need. Obviously, we've messed up there. The poor kid wouldn't have food or clothes to speak of. 3) Speaking of mess! My husband and I aren't the neatest people in the world. Obviously, no one would place a child in our care 4) My husband and I can't even agree on how long we've been trying. Donald states it's only been a few month. I say it's been 3 years. I've agreed that "trying" to him means keeping track of cycles on a small computer or the rhythm method to track cycles. To me, it's been not using birth control. That's been at least two or three years.

I wonder if my blog is just a bunch of whining. How is God in charge of all this? How can I get my head around the fact that He's sovereign over all this? How do I explain this to people?


At 8:41 AM, Blogger JamieS said...

Doesn't 5 years seem like a LONG time???? Congrats to you both. You are blessed to have one another.


At 8:41 AM, Blogger Perdita said...

I think you've listed several valid reasons on why you shouldn't be having children right now, and perhaps it's a blessing that you're not getting pregnant.

How can you love a little helpless baby when you don't really, fully love yourself yet?

Children are a lot of work, and even if the weight weren't a conception concern, it would be one once you had a toddler to run after.

Overweight women who do get pregnant have babies with a higher birth weight, making for a more difficult delivery, and the chances of miscarriage are higher.

Also, stressing about it will make for an even harder for your body to be fertile.

I think a baby is the last thing you need, with so many other issues going on in your life.

At 11:31 PM, Blogger Pitypat said...

I was just reading over your blog and wondered if you have PCOS (Poly cystic Ovarian syndrome) It's more common thatn people think and it's one reason for unexplained weight that is so hard to come off. I've done the TTC thing and IF too long and just thought i'd bring it up to help.....
Log onto Fertility or google PCOS to find out more.....


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